Dear readers! Last week I had an enlightening moment. One than initially filled me with dread, shock and horror but have come to accept. I have discovered I am a procrastinator! I am, indeed, a total utter procrastinator! The first reaction of shock and horror was due to my assumption that procrastinators are horrible people who are lazy and don't bother or care about doing things. And that is simple not me. I am not lazy and I do care about things.
As you might already know, I am taking a
short course on Pattern Making at the
London College of Fashion. I'll be finishing off in two weeks and already a bit sad to see the end of it. I am loving it so, so much and there is so much more to be learned (I would probably give an arm and a leg to be able to do a full time course). My main motivation to do this course is the zillion ideas for designs in my head that I simply cannot put on paper. I am terrible at drawing, even though I am trying!
I want to be able to design my own clothes but I would also love to share these designs with other people. How exactly, I do not know yet but I have a few possible ideas kicking about in my head.
And this is how I realised I am a procrastinator!! I have ideas, I somewhat know what I want to do but I fail to do it. I know what little steps (some, at least) I need to take to reach my goal but I end up doing other stuff. I delay, delay, delay and then get frustrated because I haven't done what I want.
Google is my friend and I found out a bit more about procrastinators that I have identified with myself (and that made me accept the fact a bit better):
- Procrastinators get overwhelmed when the task ahead is too big. Well, that's me! When there's so many things to do and so many things to find out and things that I don't know about, things to consider....ahhhh! I am like this at work actually and thought it was because I didn't love the task ahead but it's not. It's the complexity and enormity of the task.
- Procrastinators can be so because they are perfectionists. We'll, that's me too! I want to make sure everything is just right and all the conditions met. I know in real life this is not possible and mistakes and errors are the best way of learning, but I want to have it as good as I can. This happens in my day job too. I usually tweak an action plan for ages until someone asks me when am I going to implement it.
- Finally, and this is the crunch one with my current objective. I am so afraid of being a utter failure and not being able to hack it. And actually on my day job I don't have this problem mostly because it's not just my project (I might lead but there are hundreds of active partners whom success depends on too).
So what are your thoughts on this? Are you a procrastinator? Do you have any tips in how to deal with it? As always, I would love to read your thoughts. (and honestly, if you know of any great self help book to deal with it, I am that desperate ;)
Photos taken with phone and compact camera using Instagram or edited in Picnik.